Hey faggots,
Like so many other people, I've been imagining myself winning the lottery and rolling around in piles of hundred dollar bills naked. Using them as napkins, making underwear out of them and wiping my ass with them while sitting on my diamond covered super-toilet.
Over the years, I've thought about what I would do if I ever won millions of dollars. First of all, I would buy enough sports cars for all my friends and family. I wouldn't give them to my friends and family, but I'd have enough for them. I would build a complex maze of tunnels and secret hideouts under my mansion. I wouldn't use it as a bomb shelter or anything, but every four years I would live down there so I wouldn't be subjected to the idiotic ramblings of uneducated teenagers about who's moving to Canada when so-and-so wins the presidential election.
I would also build a sunk-in super-bed. If you're unfamiliar with sunk-in super-beds, they're beds that are built into the ground so that the top of the bed is level with the rest of the floor. The bed would be made up of about 6-7 king sized mattresses, this way I'd have enough room to fit all of the Sports Illustrated swimsuit models as well as the entire US Olympic swim team.
I'm a man who loves showers, so my shower would consist of approximately 27 shower heads with varying pressures and spray patterns, a radio, a TV, a PS3, a couch, another TV, a pinball machine and a cooler filled with beer. Essentially I just want to sit in my living room naked while water is sprayed all over the goddamned place. Yeah, I can't wait to be a millionaire.
No comments:
Post a Comment